Saturday, December 25, 2010

I am Insulted

One Friday evening.... I was driving down from my place of work to my home. (In between... let me tell you ....I love long drives....my place of work is approximately 150 kms away from my home town...so I used to come home only once in a week....) A guy with a smaller car was trying desperately to over take me.... I was driving at an average speed of 70 Kms/hr, which is really fast or over speeding, considering the size and state of the road.

Still he wants to over take me.... After some time, I gave him side and he over took.....while overtaking he gave me a look which declared that "I have defeated you" (or I felt so)......I smiled to myself.......but suddenly so many thoughts flashed into my mind....Why he wants to over take me....? Why he wants to defeat me...? Why should I fail to him with my one of the most powerful vehicle in Indian roads...Blood gushed into m brains to act and prove...

Oh..God.....!!!!!!! My Ego got hurt... I am insulted....

Though it was extremely risky....I pushed down my accelerator....after a terrific battle on the road....finally I over took him....what a huge win...!!!!!. I saw the disappointment on his face through my rear view mirror......Now I am happy...extremely happy...... as I have achieved the greatest car racing prize in this planet..!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But my happiness didn't last for a long time.....so many thoughts flashed into my mind... what I have gained from taking such a huge risk...? How easily my behavior got influenced by some one I never knew, have no role in my life, seeing for the fist time and just for a few seconds..? He may be a driver, or an illiterate, or a crazy guy, or drunk..or any one

I understood that....The number of books which I have read....The number of talks which I have listen to...The number courses which I have done......my profession...education .... had no impact or control on my behavior....All gone utter waste......I felt I reduced as a mustard seed ....so small....

By whom I am guided.....? by myself or people around me..? Lost my light..? Can any one change my behavior that easily...??? Why am I like this...? Why are we like this...?

Why do we struggle so hard....... for things which we never use.....????

I don't know.....But one thing I know I got insulted...terribly insulted ....

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